4 posts tagged “mindfulness”

Why do we compete with not only each other, but within ourselves as well? How have we fallen into the trap of allowing ourselves to be defined  and identified by what happens to our bodies, our relationships, our work and our possessions? We happily allow our expectations of what we are suppose to have, what is suppose to happen and how things are suppose to work,  to become the gate keeper to our identity and our happiness.

Nothing is to be clung to as I, me or mine – Buddha

However we do cling don’t we? To false values and  false expectations that actually inflict pain and suffering upon us. Too often we cling to the stress and anguish of our everyday lives that makes us deeply unhappy because we have come to so deeply identify ourselves with our pain and suffering that we can’t release that which is causing us the most harm. We  allow our thoughts to compete against the choices we could make to allow more contentment and happiness to enter out life. We cling to that which is not intrinsicly I, me or mine. We fill our lives with clutter. Mind clutter, physical clutter, material clutter.  Our whole self is orientated towards ourself, our situation, and  anything else we have chosen to allow to have importance in our life often until our thoughts morph and morph and spin into a realm outside of reality.

To stop this self destructive behaviour we have to recognise our relationship to our thoughts, our bodies and our lives. One way to do this  is to let our senses rien over our thoughts for a change. Our senses of hearing, seeing, touch, smell and taste. By using our senses we can declutter the chaos in our minds and cease the self destructive habits that keep us in the mouse maze of our life.

Of course our minds are going to resist this change. It doesn’t like competition. After all, it is used to being the boss, and has been for our entire lives. But it has just become a bad habit, just like over eating, or chewing our nails. By clicking off the automatic pilot and taking control of our own self we can bring lightness and joy back into our existence.

Living again in the natural world, seeing the rain on the window pane, the insect on the flower, the leaf on the path, experiencing the sensation of our foot upon that path, the brush of the fabric against our skin, the hair brush on our scalp, while hearing the birdsong, the voices about us, the car in the distance, tasting and smelling our morning coffee and the aromas of our cooking will soon push out the competition from our self destrutive thoughts and feelings, allowing us to free ourselves from that which makes us identify with things, thoughts  and actions that cause us the most pain and allow us detach from the past to be present in our own moment.

If we can place our thoughts inside a larger awareness we can see where our misconceptions and perceptions have filted reality and our “self”. Discernment will allow us to see, hear and feel and thus view the negative and the full spectrum of our reality. If we pay attention to the fragments, the degrees of things, we actually see things more clearly. Experiencing the full spectrum of our own experiences and existence will give us a renewed potential to see ourselves and find ways that bring meaning back into out daily lives and nourishes our spirit, and releases us from our rat maze of selfdestructive competition and non reality.

My inside listen to me, the greatest spirit,

The teacher is near,

Wake up, wake up,

Run to his feet –

he is standing close to your head right now,

You have slept for millions and millions of years

Why not wake us this morning?

                       Kabir

No tow trucks today. Instead I got to follow a florist’s delivery van for much of the way. That was nice as I could imagine all the smiles as people received flowers that day. If I were rich I would surround myself with fresh flowers throughout my house. Now I just gather what I can from my garden and that is joy itself.

I pulled up at the traffic lights behind a man who was drinking from a wine glass. Perhaps he had been to a champagne breakfast and had to rush away before he finished the champagne. He looked very elegant, except he was driving a plumber’s truck, so it sort of spoilt the image. I would like to imagine that he had the white wine for lunch tucked in his lunch bag and a bottle of red decantered at home.

At the opposite end of the spectrum, while I was observing the champagne sipping plumber, a homeless man walked by on the footpath. He had his hands on the back of both hips and was griping his pants tightly, holding them up. I wanted to roll down the window and suggest that he go to Lifeline or St Vincent’s de Paul [aka Goodwill] and ask them for a belt. Or a pair of pants that fit. Isn’t that what they are there for?  True, his pants would not have made much of a swap, a journey straight to the bin would have been about the only option., but how can you be homeless and walk around holding your pants up? There used to be a man named Ziggy who lived under a pile of rubbish  on the footpath in one of our posher inner city suburbs. They tried to find him shelter but he always returned to his garbage pile. One day some teenagers tried to set him on fire. Luckily he was not badly hurt. However he became a bit of a media sensation after that, He was vert adept at giving interviews from beneath his garbage pile. Eventually he decided to move camp and has since disappeared to one of the outer suburbs. I hope they are kinder to him. Of course as long as it is not my suburb.

A middle aged man driving a sports convertible [isn’t it always a middle aged man’s life crisis?] passed me, well zoomed passed me at the speed of light, and I read that his license plate read MODEST. I think not. I hate those personalized number plates, So pretentious. I particularly hate the ones that say MUM too. I would drive over the person who arranged that little surprise for me!   I can understand your initials, it does help to locate the car in the car park, so I will give you that one. The rest….hmm, no.

I had a bit of an epiphany or realization last night in our mindfulness workshop. We went over all the things we have learnt over the past few weeks and practiced the meditation, breathing and visualization techniques. I  was visualizing my breath going from my stomach, up through my respiratory system,  into my nose, out my nostrils and feeling the sensation of my breath on my top lip. I was really into this and enjoying the moment, when  the realization came to me that when I  visualized my body as a whole, that I was visualizing the left side as slightly clearer and brighter then the right side. When I visualized the breath going into my nose and out my nostrils I was actually only visualizing the left side of my nose and my left nostril. It was the weirdest sensation, and it almost freaked me out strangely enough.

I assume that this happens because I am blind on the right side. Even though I am right handed and had full sight for the first 18 years of my life, after 32 years as a Cyclops my brain no longer visualizes the right side of my body as strongly, or as clearly,  as my left side.

This is possibly related to the fact that for over 12 months I used my mouse at work when it was back to front without realizing it. For twelve months if I needed the cursor to go left, I had to move the mouse to the right, and I absolutely did not realize this. I think this was because I don’t actually see my right hand operating the mouse as I have no peripheral vision on the right side. It was only when the IT guy came to sort out an issue with my computer that he picked up the problem. He could not use the mouse and so quickly changed it to the correct one for me! He thinks I am a right brain left brain genius now and for the time being I will let him labor under that misconception.

Perhaps this is something you psychologists should look into…how the brain compensates for these things. Also please tell me why in 32 years I had not noticed this before. Obviously I really needed to work on my mindfulness. Or is this a sign that I am becoming the Invisible Woman and slowing fading away? Will I have to soon lay in a supply of linen bandages so that I can wrap my entire body in them so that I have a form that can be seen by the rest of the world, and people wont go around bumping into me, or sitting on my lap thinking I am a vacant chair? Maybe I can see my story to Hollywood and then I could buy thsoe flowers, and homeless men trouser belts.

Anyway it threw my visualization right off last night. I was quite happy when they called a halt and we had to fill out some follow up questionnaires. Apparently we are now released to our own general mindfulness and they will follow us up in six months. No doubt to see how many of us have thrown ourselves off bridges, or taking machetes to our work colleagues or something.

My daughter was saved the embarrassment of her mother being thrown out of the mindfulness class, though I came very close when during the quiet breathing exercise 1. my mobile phone went off ( I thought it was switched of!) and 2. my stomach started to growl, LOUDLY. She knows it is always a risk taking me out in public.

It was actually fun. I did have second thoughts I must admit when we were all handed a sultana and told to look at it closely, then roll it between our fingers, sniff, taste and chew it. We had a group discussion about it afterwards. Daughter announced that despite the fact that she actually likes eating sultanas to look at it that mindfully grossed her out. She is my daughter, bless her. My worry was that I wouldn't finish eating it at the same time as everyone else, or that I would choke on it, or have sultana stuck to the front of my tooth for the rest of the session and not be aware of it! I manged to hold on to it all and we passed onto the next exercise.

There were nine women in our group and two female facilitators, who are conducting the research. We nine were of various ages. Four of us were postmaternal age, the others mainly uni students. There was another mother /daughter duo also (I thought we were more attractive!)

We could lie on the floor or sit. Daughter managed to bag us two really comfy chairs so we stayed with the seats. I think she knew that if I got down I may not rise again.

I found the guided relaxation and breathing session to be a wonderful experience. I really did feel a benefit from it right away. Some people said that they started to itch and needed to scratch at some stage, but I didn't have any issues. at the end of the hour and a half we were sent off with instructions to practice our mindfulness breathing every day, and asked to maintain a diary for them which we are to hand in each week,

We both did the breathing this morning. My daughter even went so far as to "mindfully" eat her breakfast. I must say that she did indeed seems happier this morning also. Not sure if it is the relaxation techniques or the new boyfriend, We will have to wait and see on that one!

I found it much harder to settle to the process without the verbal guidance of the group leader. I guess I am just good at following instructions and without someone giving me those instructions it is harder to settle my thoughts. I set the oven timer for 10 minutes as they suggested and settled to breath and relax various parts of my body - tummy, down left leg. down right leg etc. My mind went off on all tangents but I gradually got it under control and was just up the relaxing my chest bit when the oven timer went off. Obviously I need longer than 10 minutes, I will bump it up to 20 minutes tomorrow. I did feel that I had gained some benefit though. Not bad for day I I think. Well as much as I could expect for ME, anyway!

I think this is going to be a positive thing for me. I look forward to the rest of the journey.

If you let cloudy water settle, it will become clear. If you let your upset mind settle, your course will also become clear.

From Buddha’s Little Instruction Book (Kornfield: Bantam Books, 1994)

I am going to a Mindfulness Workshop tonight. It is the first of 4 sessions and is part of a University research program. I have volunteered to be a guinea pig. I am selfishly praying that I get something out of it also. I do have to pay $50 for the workshops so they must think there is going to be of some value to me. My daughter is also atttending with me. We are going to be mindful together! I hope that they don't call me aside after class and ask me not to return because I am a Mindfulness failure - an empty vessel!

Stay tuned! It should be amusing if nothing else!

Mindfulness practice is ideal for cultivating greater awareness of the unity of mind and body, as well as of the ways the unconscious thoughts, feelings, and behaviors can undermine emotional, physical, and spiritual health. The mind is known to be a factor in stress and stress-related disorders, and meditation has been shown to positively effect a range of autonomic physiological processes, such as lowering blood pressure and reducing overall arousal and emotional reactivity. In addition to mindfulness practices, MBSR uses martial arts to help reverse the prevalence of disuse atrophy from our culture's largely sedentary lifestyle, especially for those with pain and chronic illnesses. The program brings meditation and yoga together so that the virtues of both can be experienced simultaneously .

How Can It Help?

Benefits of the program include:

• Lasting decreases in physical and psychological symptoms
• Decreased pain levels and better ability to cope with pain that may not go away
• Improved immune function
• A greater sense of control
• Improved relationships with self and others
• Increased ability to focus and concentrate
• Ability to respond more effectively to short and long-term stress
• Management of life circumstances with greater acceptance
• Enhanced health and well-being
• Ability to make choices with greater clarity and awareness

What Can It Help?

People participate for reasons as diverse as:

• Anxiety and panic
• Chronic pain - headaches, fibromyalgia, etc.
• Chronic illness – cancer, HIV/AIDS, organ transplants
• Emotional upset – inappropriate expressions of anger, chronic fearfulness
• Fatigue
• Heart disease
• High blood pressure
• Sleep disruption
• Stress – job, family, financial
• Wellness and health promotion

Engaging with your life in this manner helps you become more skilful and creative in our responses, while gaining insight into how to free ourselves from habitual patterns of reacting such as anxiously anticipating the future, chronically focusing on the past or just going through the motions of living, missing what is actually occurring right now.

http://www.mindfullivingprograms.com/whatMBSR.php

 MINDFULNESS TECHNIQUES TO PRACTISE

One Minute Exercise:

􀂃 Sit in front of a clock or watch that you can use to time the passing of one minute. Your task is to focus your entire attention on your breathing, and nothing else, for the minute. Have a go - do it now.

􀂃 While walking you concentrate on the feel of the ground under your feet, your breathing while walking. Just observe what is around you as you walk, staying IN THE PRESENT. Let your other thoughts go, just look at the sky, the view, the other walkers; feel the wind, the temperature on your skin; enjoy the moment.

De-stressing Exercise:

􀂃 Bring yourself into the present by deliberately adopting an erect and dignified posture.

􀂃 Then ask yourself: "What is going on with me at the moment?"

􀂃 You simply allow yourself to observe whatever happens. Label any thoughts that you have and then leave them alone….just be prepared to let them float away. Attend to your breathing or simply take in your surroundings instead.

􀂃 Besides thoughts, there may be sounds you hear, bodily sensations that you are aware of. If you find yourself constantly elaborating on thoughts, rather than labelling them and returning to the neutral, remember to observe your breathing.

􀂃 When emotions or memories of painful events occur, don’t allow yourself to become caught up by them.

􀂃 Give them short labels such as “that’s a sad feeling”, “that’s an angry feeling” and then just allow them to drift or float away. These memories and feelings will gradually decrease in intensity and frequency.

􀂃 More importantly, you will begin to identify yourself as an objective observer or witness rather than a person who is disturbed by these thoughts and feelings. This requires practise but can then be used when ever you are stressed.

Associated Breathing Exercise:

􀂃 Stay with any distressing thoughts for a few moments, then as you let them float away, you gently redirect your full attention to your breathing.

􀂃 Pay attention to each breath in and out as they follow rhythmically one after the other. This will ground you in the present and help you to move into a state of awareness and stillness.

http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/docs/HandoutMindfulnessinEverydayLife.pdf

 Listening to Music

Listening to music has many benefits — so many, in fact, that music is being used therapeutically in a new branch of complimentary medicine known as music therapy. That’s part of why listening to music makes a great mindfulness exercise. You can play soothing new-age music, classical music, or another type of slow-tempo music to feel calming effects, and make it an exercise in mindfulness by really focusing on the sound and vibration of each note, the feelings that the music brings up within you, and other sensations that are happening "right now" as you listen. If other thoughts creep into your head, congratulate yourself for noticing, and gently bring your attention back to the current moment and the music you are hearing.

 Cleaning House

The term "cleaning house" has a literal meaning (cleaning up your actual house) as well as a figurative one (getting rid of "emotional baggage," letting go of things that non longer serve you), and both can be great stress relievers! Because clutter has several hidden costs and can be a subtle but significant stressor, cleaning house and de-cluttering as a mindfulness exercise can bring lasting benefits. To bring mindfulness to cleaning, you first need to view it as a positive event, an exercise in self-understanding and stress relief, rather than simply as a chore. Then, as you clean, focus on what you are doing as you are doing it — and nothing else. Feel the warm, soapy water on your hands as you wash dishes; experience the vibrations of the vacuum cleaner as you cover the area of the floor; enjoy the warmth of the laundry as you fold it; feel the freedom of letting go of unneeded objects as you put them in the donations bag. It may sound a little silly as you read it here, but if you approach cleaning as an exercise in mindfulness, it can become one. (I also recommend adding music to the equation.)

http://stress.about.com/od/tensiontamers/a/exercises.htm