13 posts tagged “revenge”

The girl who shared her germs with me nine weeks ago and gave me a cold to start my prac with and commenced the downward spiral of my immune system, sat beside me in a lecture today. I coughed all over her.

Life lesson 962: Take your revenge, how, when and where you can get it...it won't solve things, but hey the instant gratification goes a long way!

Oh yeah. Back to school today.

I almost turned around and went back home, as coughing and sneezing and generally secreting mucous I missed the new turnoff that I had to take and ended up in the industrial badlands. You know how it is on a freeway, miss your exit and it is another 4 years before you can find another that will take you back where you want to go.  Or even the state that you would like to be in. The freeway has been under construction forever, and this week they opened up new exits and of course I wasn't thinking, at all, and sailed right by the one I should have taken. This is pretty frightening for a flamingo dancer with no sense of direction. I thought I was going to have to phone MR FD, who arrived home early last night, and tell him where I thought I was, and order him to come and lead me out, but after about 15 minutes in the industrial badlands I found my way back onto the right road.

Next, I had to spend 2 hours supervising QCS practice. QCS stands for Queensland Core Skills, and is part of the examination process that every year 12 student who wishes to go onto university has to undertake. The real tests are later in the year, but to soothe nerves they practice before hand. Today's test was a 2 hour written response to stimulus English test. I played my part by walking around the 63 students in  my area and returning my germs to them. Revenege is indeed sweet.

It was hard not to cough or splutter during the 2 hours and disturb the dahlings. Most of the time I just stood quietly to the side secreting more phelgm and muscous. I felt the coughs coming on,  but managed to hold it in. I did fear that my brains were going to explode out my ears at any moment though. I deserve a medal for dedication to duty.

Apparently in the real QCS tests, we teachers are not to even make eye contact with a student, or stand in any way that it could be assumed that we are looking over their shoulder. Very strict guidlines. I don't know how, or why, these rules are in existence. They just are.

By early afternoon, I felt like something a puppy would regurgitate after being locked in the house, alone for a long weekend. Apparently I looked like it too, as the doctor who is a prac teacher with us, came over to me and said that in her professional opinion I should go home to bed. I didn't argue, I was gone in 5 minutes.

Tomorrow is Friday....just have to live that long.

Sleep of the not so innocent

SLEEPING Mr FD: "Oh no, no I wont enjoy this!"....and then he giggled like a 14 year old school girl.

I woke him - he was right, he wasn't going to enjoy "this".

.

I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it - Flamingo Dancer style!.
  - apologies to Rita Mae Brown

I went to THE UNIVERSITY yesterday to hand in forms for obtaining a blue card (checking that I don't have a police record so that I can work with children) and my preferences for what regions I would prefer for prac work. I also got a couple of my text books. I can't get my id card until Feb 16th - time to shed 5 kgs at least!

Unavoidably I met many people from my previous existence in the Basement of Discontent and despite my trying to keep a low profile - I know impossible for a Flamingo Dancer- I had to do an almost presidential meet and greet. Human curiosity, aint it grand? What are you doing? Student. How are they going to manage without you? Don't care. How am I going to manage without you? Sorry, but where were you when we needed supported to stop all this? How are we going to obtain..... Talk to the hand.

They were universal in saying how great I looked - and how tres beautiful my hair is. They all mentioned that I looked younger and more relaxed! I question their eyesight on that one. I have noticed that I have perked a little. And yesterday, and this will sound strange, but I have always been the type of person who will tear up over a dog food commercial and I am not all that keen on dogs! Yesterday ,I teared up during Obama Day listening to some of the African American people tell how much having a black president meant to them. I also teared up over a commercial. It was then that I realised that I hadn't done that for some months. Actually many months.

Silly isn't it? Somehow, I lost touch with some simple emotions. I guess stress, anger and uncertainty will do that to you. So in what will be my 51st year I am learning to be me again. Yes, it is frightening times, and we are close to personal  financial meltdown, but by picking myself up and shaking myself off and starting AGAIN, somehow I have opened parts of me that had shut down.

You can't help what happens to you, but you can try and make it happen the best you can...I will not let the bastards get me down.

p.s. OF COURSE MY MOOD WAS ENHANCED TO HEAR THAT THE OUTSOURCING HAS BEEN A COMPLETE DISASTER AND EVERYONE IS TEARING THEIR HAIR OUT. revenge, in whatever form it arrives, is sweet.

I didn’t notice at first, but home alone in the Basement of Discontent this afternoon, I found myself just sitting there swinging back and forth on my chair. Blank mind. Just swingin’. I was “basement” alone all day. The Assistant took the day off to go update her will – hopefully she decided what to do with her mother’s ashes at the same time too, as they are still in a box in the living room. It is a very nice box, but it is still in the living room. SWKK is still in a fugue and takes leave most Fridays and Mondays now so she can sit at home and perfect her fugue for Tuesdays. Better than sitting in the office and doing nothing I guess…you could find yourself just swinging on your chair otherwise.

Boss didn’t come in. Sent various cryptic messages during the day. He would be in at noon, or maybe 2pm – make that not at all. His mobile was off, it was on silent, send text messages only – no one bothered to do any of the above. We have lived three years without asking him anything, why start now with only 28 working days to go before we are all “Ho, Ho, Home you go, and stay there!”?

Tell me cosmos – does office chair swinging qualify as a form of exercise? Will I develop great calf muscles? Or dislocate a hip? Is it ever going to be a demonstration sport at the Olympics?  I can sort of see it slotting into London, that center of business acumen and CBD of many office chairs. Give it a new twist on the label “Swinging London”.

Excitingly, I appear to have spontaneously perfected the left to right swing action. I can swing and still read my computer screen too. Not bad for a one eyed hen! I am so proud of me. I never cease to thrill and amaze myself with my many and varied talents.  I also do it with great agility and style. God, I am good. Not unexpected that I am though.

                                                    *****************            

On another note – what is it about redundancy that makes you want to steal office supplies? Useless stuff like rubber thumb stalls (those little rubber thingies that you see bank tellers wearing on the ends of their fingers when they count notes) and conference name holders with pins to wear on your shirt. Not a lot of call for either when unemployed I fear.

Knowing that you are about to be pushed out the exit door makes you kind of ANGRY. However you can’t be too angry as these are the schmucks youed to give you a reference when you leave. So you peruse the office supplies and cast your eye over boxes of lead pencils and bags of rubber bands. Totally mindless stuff. But somehow the thought of lifting it just seems so comforting. So warm and fluffy and inviting. Take me, take me…

And then Sister Mary Ethel Rita steps back into your mind and you see her there with her leather strap and you halt, hand quivering mid air. Maybe not. It probably wouldn’t be the right printer cartridge for our printer anyway…

Maybe tomorrow will offer better pickings anyway. I think someone said a bulk delivery of Kleenex tissues was due Tuesday…that I could use, crying all the way Ho Ho Home.

Got a big jolly today.

Apparently MegaBoss, Boss. and the gent who is "acting" for Mega Bitch now that she is no more, and has never been part of our organisation and is MERELY a friend of MegaBoss, have been meeting over the past few days trying to find a way to compile some specific information.

Being men they did not think to ask the person who is actually the specialist in that area - YES, MOI! The one and only Flamingo Dancer!  Finally the Acting One phoned me from his throne room and asked me if he could do this or that and I said "what is it you want to do actually?" and lo, it was so simple I almost burst ou laughing. Within half an hour I had the report on its way to his kingdom. I did enjoy the fact that I calmly made it look so simple, well it was actually, but they were stupid enough not to ask the right person in the first place so they deserved to sweat for a couple of days.

The jollies don't come often these days, but rare jewels that they are, they are still there to be enjoyed. And I did! Happy, happy little flamingo dance...it is a small life, but someone has to live it.

Life lesson 483 : Take your enjoyment, no matter how small, where and when you can! They don't often get offered twice.

I wondered how long it would take before the announcement came – MEGABITCH HAS RESIGNED! Her last day is next Friday. She is going overseas, they may live in the south of France, but heading to UK first, dahling. Such a stereotype! I wondered how she was going to avoid having this mess on her resume and so resigning to go overseas before the final crunch gives her a blessed little way to avoid all culpability. “collapse? Oh yes that all happened after I left!”. I hope she flies QANTAS – is that terrible of me, to wish her ill winds? Nah.

She said that the last time she left her place of employment that all her employees cried …I guess a few might be crying this time too, but not for any good reason. I for one will be dancing in the street.

Of course, that means that for the next few weeks, MegaMegaBoss is away, pretending to attend a conference in Germany, but really going on a 2 week vacation paid for by we poor plebs and cruds, and now no misOperations Manager. Not that anyone will notice either of their absences, but then again, nothing is going to get signed off in that time either.

We had a staff meeting today. I used the “shit” word once or twice, as in “does no one give a shit about the people working here”, not that I didn’t know the answer already. The lack of information and change management support has been zero, zilch, and everyone is lurching through each day with a deep seated feeling of chaos. We just want a speedy, fair and equitable resolution and to get our lives back. Of course MegaMegaBoss didn’t attend – he was supposedly in the building but not sighted by anyone.

MegaBitch ended the meeting by saying “I give a shit” and how terrible it has been for her, having to battle the big bad boys…PLEEEAAASSSSEEEE. She was lucky to get out of there without a stoning. She wanted to take a stand so resigned. I’ll take a stand on her head if she is not careful – I am not Flamingo dancer for nothing!

My hun blood is above – thanks to Ubi Caritas ‘s  advice , I  am going to take that last plank and whack a few people, good and hard, before I take my cardboard box and office plant and go lie in the street.

another staff meeting today

We trooped into the monthly staff meeting today - those who couldn't invent good excuses not to, that is. I got out of my death bed to attend...perhaps I exaggerate just a little, my sick bed. It was a waste of time and effort. MegaBitch sat for close to an hour telling us how hard all this has been for her, and all the hard work she has to go through working through the change over to the outsourcing...and finished off by saying "I know how hard this must be for you all, so if there is anything, anything I can do to help you at all, please let me know". I had to struggle to keep my inside words from leaping into my mouth and escaping as outside words...go lie in the road then!

So this afternoon we all met with the union rep. I wasn't a member but I am now! We realise that we can't really stop things but we can make them perform to the letter of the law... and we might even have a case to argue gross mismanagement by MegaMegaBoss and MegaBitch and have a pitch for their positions to be re-evaluated as they will only have half a position when we are outsourced. So some mud will stick...this may be an era that they`will want to skip on their resume! We may go down but not without a fight...the Flamingo dancers again.

It is interesting though. My assistant fashions herself a little rebel, Billy Bragg is her hero, along with Che , but comes the crunch and she just folds... she creates passive aggressive emails because she wont ask a direct question and rants and raves in the background but wont stand up for herself. Nothing is ever her fault, her responsibility, and she abdicates her own life to others and yet is angry about it all. Not at herself, but she rants about capitalism and elites etc etc. Bit much from a 36 year old! She is not the only one. And there are others at work who are docile and quiet and don't quite understand what is happening to them, but they are stepping up to the plate and fighting the good fight. Still waters run deep I guess after all. I guess it is a bit like Churchill and how he was a great leader in war but not so great in peace time - different types for different occasions and people never cease to amaze one. Thank heavens!

                                                           The End

I have just had two glasses of a very nice unwooded chardonnay. Doesn't that sound posh? If only I knew what it meant. ANYWAY, I have had two glasses of wine, which is a lot for this little pink headed flamingo and so I am not only feeling a little pissed but a little pissed off at my universe as well.  Finding it hard to find the glass half full tonight, well mainly because I keep drinking it, but that is beside the point. Change is so damn bothersome. I feel like spitting in the eye of the storm...obviously I would be a very bad tempered drunk if I was so inclined to this on a regular basis. Not just because I want to spit, but also because I told Mr FD that if he stepped out of line and annoyed me tonight that he might just find his gentlemanly bits pulled up through his right nostril and out his left ear. He knows I don't bluff.

So writing job appplications tomorrow. What fun ho! Making out that I am the world expert in something to answer an ad where they have requested only applications from people who know more than they, but wont let on that they do, to apply. And do it for 98 cents a day. before tax.

Yep bitter and twisted...and gonne chew them up....well at least for tonight, before tomorrow's headache.

If only I could be philosphical and mellow like Snowy...he has such class. I just plot revenge.

... that's right, I said up the nostril and out the ear!